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Brainwashed

Every single day same scenario. I do not have time for myself or for anybody. Can not do some things that I like and enjoy or go out with friends. I became to tired for all of that. Wondering why? I tell you why. It is not some sad story, it is only real life, that everyone must fight with. Working, a small meaningless job, that destroys our brains, that is the only reason why I lost every desire for life and joy. And I am not the only one. If I lost everything now, what would happen later, when I become old? What to expect then? Probably nothing.

Growing up

As a child you can see unknown dimensions for the grown up. But they do not understand you, because you are just a kid, and nobody takes you seriously. You are made for playing all day long, and you should not have any problems. That sounds so wonderful. But it is not real childhood. It is just mistake, our mistake, we do not want to get them. And now we do not remember how we felt in those moments. Otherwise we would be very sorry for everything. Unfortunately we have our own sich brains after some time in life, so we can see how everything around us can be beautiful. We see only the bad sides. That boring and gray everyday life, that sad and unhappy people. Only that. We forgot how it looks like to be happy and satisfied. Maybe because someone decided to make us his own robots? It is easier to manage with a crowd of people. But it is enough conspiracy theories for now.
It is not easy to decide to become independent and start to earn your own money, and pay those thing that are used to be paid by your parents. It is really hard. It is a big step into unknown life for all of us. But that day must come. Like it or not, it is called a life. You are prepared for hard time, but sometimes it become even harder, and you can not know how to solve all those problems. Being an adult is not so easy as I thought. When you are kid it looks much more simpler and you can not wait to become one. What a mistake…

Call Center Operator

You can not work some good job when you are student. But it is not bad. You just must realize that you will not have time for your personal life. As someone who want to do a lot of stuff everyday, it would be sad life, because you can forget on all of that. But it is not the only problem. We all need to work, we all need to earn and live. How it looks like to work in some call center. People usually say that is good. But it is not. People are calling you every single moment. And in Bosnia, no matter what job you are doing, you do not have a normal conditions. Your free time is limited, you can not even blink, someone is looking you, and maybe after you will have some problems. They are looking and listening everything. It is worse that house of Big Brother. I am really surprised that we do not have cameras even in toilet. It is terrible. You can not do anything. They will always find something bad. Remember 1984 by George Orwell? This is even worse. Even there they have more freedom than we. when you come in that building, you know that you are not free person, you are not employee, you are a slave. They do not even think about that we are all students or someone who finished college, they treat us as trash. Even they do not qualified for their job, or any job. But it is how it looks like when you are living in the world where only corruption can give you a job.

After work

You think after you finish shift that is all over. No! It is never over. You can not sleep well, because you have some noise in your head, because of headphones that you are wearing all day long. And you become very nervous and you can easily loose your temper. It is all because of stress and because of that you have listen how people yell at you all day long, because someone else annoyed them. It is circle of life, circle of stress, how ever you want. But it can be useful for you, only bad. So this kind of job it is not for long time. If you do not need to work, do not go in call center at all. You will not be satisfied. And no money can comfort you. It is too much.

What about them?

At least you think that you can find some empathy in you colleagues. But it is lost fight too. They do not feel anything at all. Only think about theirselves. And they do not understand that we are all having some obligations. They are selfish and self-centered, and they can not see anyone else. So you can not count on them either. You are on your own. You can not expect anyone to help you. But I am already used to it. So everyday it feels like I am going to the prison. Or worse, to the mental hospital. But I need to handle it.

Brainwashed


After work you do not have any energy for friends, for some hobbies, or whatever you want to do. You just feel empty inside. You feel like you can not do anything at all. Just sit and look in one spot on the wall, thinking nothing. You do not feel as a human anymore. It is terrible. I just want to be free, and go wherever I want, but there is no desire for all of that. They kill everything in you. We are all becoming robots, with no feelings, and only made for work.



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